Ellen is a phenomenal woman who works in the banking industry, wrote a book called The Women's Guide to Prosperity, has a family, gives back to the community, is a public speaker/motivator, and is one of those women that you just want to pick her brain. Ellen spoke to us about looking, seeing, and focusing on the positive things in our lives, and understanding the importance of measuring success through personal happiness.
I hope that I am capturing a fair amount of her wisdom and eloquence - if you want to read more, check out her site: http://www.ellenrogin.com/ and http://www.begreatwithmoney.com/. She did not ask me to write anything, I was so moved by her session this morning that I thought I'd share it with you.
Some the key takeaways:
- Focus on what you want to achieve/accomplish
- Ask yourself what's the new opportunity?
- Get rid of negative thinking - when you catch yourself saying/thinking something negative say "Cancel. Clear." So you cancel the thought, clear your mind, and get back on the positive mindset. (my husband is particularly excited about this one as I have had a few snappy moments with him - which is unfair to him).
- Clear the clutter - physical clutter and mental clutter. Did something happen in the past that is still bringing you down - we all have something (or many things) - it's time to let it go.
- Be flexible. Are you in a rut? Try new things - eat different foods at breakfast, take a different route to work/park/school, etc.
- Measure your success in Gross Personal Happiness. Once you have your basic needs covered (food, shelter, clothing), additional money does not bring additional happiness like you may think it does.
- Visualize what you want. Athletes do it. THINK about what you want, then SEE it in your mind. Imagine how you'll FEEL when it comes true, and TALK about your dream as if it's already true.
Ellen took us through a visualization exercise of what we wanted our life to look like in 6 months. I envisioned walking down a sunny street with my husband, and my son, and we were all smiling, laughing, holding hands. It was a beautiful day where the sunshine was hitting our faces, and a nice cooling breeze. I was relaxed, happy, healthy (and physically fit) and there was a sense of freedom, and lightness around me. We were all truly in the moment, enjoying every second of it.
I was able to feel that way because in 6 months, my clutter will be gone, and I won't have a to do list hanging over my head - allowing me to enjoy special time with my family. It's as if this clutter is a huge weight on my shoulders, and it's prohibiting me from moving or seeing the next opportunity. Okay, I agree, that last statement is a bit melodramatic, but it is something that is weighing on me, and this is the time to take care of it once and for all.
The last thing Ellen mentioned was a daily dose of gratitude. Every day, share with someone 5 things you are grateful for - and this is something your kids can do as well. I'll end this post with my 5 for today (in no particular order):
- Women who Flourish Business book club - this group continues to impress me with amazing women, incredible energy, insightful discussions, and has already proven to be a huge part of my personal growth.
- My husband - who I may tease and nit-pick, but when push comes to shove, he is there for me, supportive, and loving. As a team we really do make the best of some really tough situations.
- My son - who the other day while singing The Wheels on the Bus go Round and Round corrected me when I sang "The parents on the bus go shhh, shhh, shhh" he said "No Mommy. The parents on the bus go I love you." He continues to amaze me with his cuteness.
- My friends - who have been there for me through many highs and lows. They call me out on stuff, they listen to me, help me figure things out, and make me laugh when I sometimes forget why it's so important.
- My health - I am lucky to be healthy, and my body is doing well for a 30 something. In fact, I've enjoyed many power walks with friends, long rollerblades by the lake, and maybe, just maybe, I'll start running again. I'll continue to eat healthier foods (less processed, more whole grains, fruits and vegetables) and no matter what, I will never deny myself chocolate!
- (Bonus gratitude point) The men and women who protect this country and help others who aren't strong enough to protect themselves. My intention is not to justify the war, but rather to show support for our troops that give so much of themselves. I hope they can all come home safely soon.
I now understand why so many people blog, it's very therapeutic! Let me hear from you - what are you grateful for? What does your vision of happiness look like?
I hope you all have a fabulous holiday weekend.