Friday, May 28, 2010

Envisioning Positive Goals

I am fortunate to be a part of a women's business book club, that just so happens to include some incredible women. We meet monthly, and I look forward to attending each month because I learn so much from the group, as well as the guest speakers. Today's guest speaker, Ellen Rogin, was absolutely amazing.

Ellen is a phenomenal woman who works in the banking industry, wrote a book called The Women's Guide to Prosperity, has a family, gives back to the community, is a public speaker/motivator, and is one of those women that you just want to pick her brain. Ellen spoke to us about looking, seeing, and focusing on the positive things in our lives, and understanding the importance of measuring success through personal happiness.

I hope that I am capturing a fair amount of her wisdom and eloquence - if you want to read more, check out her site: http://www.ellenrogin.com/ and http://www.begreatwithmoney.com/. She did not ask me to write anything, I was so moved by her session this morning that I thought I'd share it with you.

Some the key takeaways:
  • Focus on what you want to achieve/accomplish
  • Ask yourself what's the new opportunity?
  • Get rid of negative thinking - when you catch yourself saying/thinking something negative say "Cancel. Clear." So you cancel the thought, clear your mind, and get back on the positive mindset. (my husband is particularly excited about this one as I have had a few snappy moments with him - which is unfair to him).
  • Clear the clutter - physical clutter and mental clutter. Did something happen in the past that is still bringing you down - we all have something (or many things) - it's time to let it go.
  • Be flexible. Are you in a rut? Try new things - eat different foods at breakfast, take a different route to work/park/school, etc.
  • Measure your success in Gross Personal Happiness. Once you have your basic needs covered (food, shelter, clothing), additional money does not bring additional happiness like you may think it does.
  • Visualize what you want. Athletes do it. THINK about what you want, then SEE it in your mind. Imagine how you'll FEEL when it comes true, and TALK about your dream as if it's already true.

Ellen took us through a visualization exercise of what we wanted our life to look like in 6 months. I envisioned walking down a sunny street with my husband, and my son, and we were all smiling, laughing, holding hands. It was a beautiful day where the sunshine was hitting our faces, and a nice cooling breeze. I was relaxed, happy, healthy (and physically fit) and there was a sense of freedom, and lightness around me. We were all truly in the moment, enjoying every second of it.

I was able to feel that way because in 6 months, my clutter will be gone, and I won't have a to do list hanging over my head - allowing me to enjoy special time with my family. It's as if this clutter is a huge weight on my shoulders, and it's prohibiting me from moving or seeing the next opportunity. Okay, I agree, that last statement is a bit melodramatic, but it is something that is weighing on me, and this is the time to take care of it once and for all.

The last thing Ellen mentioned was a daily dose of gratitude. Every day, share with someone 5 things you are grateful for - and this is something your kids can do as well. I'll end this post with my 5 for today (in no particular order):

  1. Women who Flourish Business book club - this group continues to impress me with amazing women, incredible energy, insightful discussions, and has already proven to be a huge part of my personal growth.
  2. My husband - who I may tease and nit-pick, but when push comes to shove, he is there for me, supportive, and loving. As a team we really do make the best of some really tough situations.
  3. My son - who the other day while singing The Wheels on the Bus go Round and Round corrected me when I sang "The parents on the bus go shhh, shhh, shhh" he said "No Mommy. The parents on the bus go I love you." He continues to amaze me with his cuteness.
  4. My friends - who have been there for me through many highs and lows. They call me out on stuff, they listen to me, help me figure things out, and make me laugh when I sometimes forget why it's so important.
  5. My health - I am lucky to be healthy, and my body is doing well for a 30 something. In fact, I've enjoyed many power walks with friends, long rollerblades by the lake, and maybe, just maybe, I'll start running again. I'll continue to eat healthier foods (less processed, more whole grains, fruits and vegetables) and no matter what, I will never deny myself chocolate!
  6. (Bonus gratitude point) The men and women who protect this country and help others who aren't strong enough to protect themselves. My intention is not to justify the war, but rather to show support for our troops that give so much of themselves. I hope they can all come home safely soon.

I now understand why so many people blog, it's very therapeutic! Let me hear from you - what are you grateful for? What does your vision of happiness look like?

I hope you all have a fabulous holiday weekend.

Thursday, May 27, 2010

The Journey Begins Online

I decided it would be a good idea to start a blog and share my experience with anyone interested. Sounds typical, right?

Well here's what I'm proposing - a summer long project where I remove procrastination from my life. Big goal - and yes, I wonder how much I'll achieve, and how long it will last - but that's why I have you (if you are out there!), you'll keep me honest.

I've always succeeded when I put my mind to something, but it was a lot more fun when I had a partner. Six years ago, I trained for my first long distance running event, a half-marathon, and then a full marathon (26.2 miles). I trained on the weekend with CARA (a Chicago area running group), and during the week, I trained with a friend that lived close to me. We ran at the same pace, both enjoyed talking during runs, and I didn't want to let her down with an excuse to not work out, and she also experienced the same accountability to me. We trained for months together, and then right at the halfway point of training, I had to have surgery.


The surgery was major enough to take me out of the rest of training, but I did run a few miles with her during the marathon to support her. The following year she moved, and I found a different training partner. Again, a great friend, we were dedicated to running together, and we both successfully completed the Chicago Marathon.

So I'm looking to you for support, advice, thoughts, feelings on how procrastination has affected your life. Here's what I've been experiencing and why I decided to start this project.


Two months ago, I heard a podcast about the Happiness Project, and thought it was an interesting idea. I thought about my life and what isn't going as smoothly as I liked (and trust me, there's a lot!), and I realized my To Do list is never ending. At times it can be overwhelming.


My husband and I have a spreadsheet called a brain dump. The idea is to free your mind of all the things you need to do, assign importance to them (to do now, next week, in the future, never do), and tackle the list when you have time. Who has time?! Our latest brain dump had 100+ items on it, anything from change a light bulb to create baby album (my son is now 2+ years old - whoops!).


I also live in an apt with a lot of clutter. My husband may be a borderline hoarder. He attaches sentimental value to items, when he sells things on ebay he wants to be sure it goes to a good home (things, not animals), and he doesn't have the organization gene in him. Opposites attract indeed!


Our home has eight closets that are decked out in the Elfa system. These closets (two are walk-ins) are packed to the gills with stuff that we never or rarely use. My husband has agreed that this summer we will go through every closet and every room and declutter. He has incentive to do this on several accounts, 1) it will keep me from going completely crazy, and 2) I will not even think of a second child until I can live in a clutter free.

I don't blame my husband for all the clutter, but I would guess the 80/20 rule is in effect here. I just can't even see my 20%!


I did have some extra time on my hands this month, and decided to tackle a project I've wanted to do for at least 10 years. I have collected hundreds of recipes that looked tasty, but never got around to actually cooking them. I knew I wanted to organize all of them in a binder, and I am happy to say it took me about 5 hours to cut, tape, organize and create a 3-4 inch thick binder of delicious sounding recipes. When I think of all the years this project has been in the back of my mind, and it only took 5 hours, well, I realized how silly it was to waste all that energy all those years thinking about it - instead of doing it.

So that's when I decided to do this blog. Instead of talking about it for a few more months/years, I'd just start and see where this journey takes me. My hypothesis is that I will focus on the things that are important, and the clutter in my life will be reduced greatly. Won't it be nice to live a life that truly focuses on the important things?

Speaking of, I have my cousins in town visiting so I'm off to meet up with them and spend some good quality time catching up.

So much to share - and I can't wait to hear from you. What do you find is cluttering your life? What did you do from your old to do list that made you happy you did it?